10 miles and a pack

I did not have my camera, but 2 other people did. I am waiting for pictures and will post them soon. But since we are leaving for Utah and Wyoming on Wednesday, I thought I would put up something I found on the web. Ignore this guys love affair with his bike. It was the only picture I could down load for free.

Thanks EndoRando at http://gallery.mtbr.com/showgallery.php?cat=all&si=Gull%20Rock

There you have it. I went on my back packing trip with the girls. We signed in at the trail head as the "Girls Night Out" group. We had 5 adults and 3 kids. I wasn't sure I was going to go once I heard the girls were coming with their moms. First because I didn't want to intrude on a Mother/Daughter thing. And second, kids change the dynamics of conversations and somewhat defeat the purpose of a Girls Night Out when there are kids along. All in all it was great, and let me tell you, I was sure glad I didn't have a kid with me. It was a fun break.

The trail was gorgeous. It went along a ridge above the south end of the Turnagain Arm of the Cook Inlet so we had views of the inlet and the mountains to the North the whole way. The ferns were almost neon against the dark brown, almost black, soil and trees. Some of the fir trees were enormous, standing there for centuries. Some of these giants had been blown down by high winds this winter.

We camped right on the point of Gull Rock with nothing but a 30 foot vertical drop separating us from the water. It was amazing to be higher than gulls that circle this point. To the south of us and tucked back in from the jagged shoreline was a cove. Black sand, mud and rock formations made me think that if this place was warm it would be an ideal place to go skinny dipping.

I couldn't help but marvel at the wonders of this land. Truly it is a beauty to behold.

And the wildlife you ask? We almost had an accidental bear encounter! The back half of our group started yelling and causing a ruckus so we turned back to find the moms with Bear Mace at the ready. They heard a loud crashing coming towards them from off the trail. They started yelling and whooping and made the crashing stop. After a moment a tentative retreat was heard going away from the trail. All classic bear behavior, apparently.

We also ran into a moose. This time it was my group at the front. We were coming around a bend, just chatting away when we heard the "moo" like noise of a moose. We stopped and yelled and heard it pass us off to the side of the trail. We spotted its fresh tracks along the trail around the bend and followed them almost all the way to camp. With the many streams we crossed and the easy access a trail provides as opposed to blazing through the thick foliage, its no wonder this moose liked our trail.

Since I didn't actually see him, does he still make the moose counter?

take note

I need someone to follow me around so that when an idea hits me, there is someone at the ready to jot down my genius. However I find that genius does not always hit me as often as random lists. Like the one I made in the shower today and am desperately trying to remember as I type this.

-Go to Wal-Mart for deodorant and prescriptions

-Don't forget to grab Smith's in Brigham City's number so that I can transfer JaDee's allergy medicine to here.

-Oh and trail mix for tomorrow's backpacking extravaganza, because I will be on a trail you know

-Make cookies for the Rampton's to say thanks for a fantastic, clam-filled, weekend. Because when I get back from the Extravaganza we are leaving for Utah in 4 days and will have no time for cookie baking

-Call Sarah about dog sitting and house sitting. Better invite her poor lonely self to dinner now that Jed is in Fairbanks

-Figure out how in the heck the 3 kids and I are getting from the airport to Ben's house. I am guessing Courtney and Brooke in the Neon is not a good fit for us and 4 suitcases.

-Where is that rain poncho?

-Blog about needing a note taker.

See what I mean. This was just the shower. I need one in the car too for all of the informative Alaska adds.

-Kenai Fjords day cruises for whale watching

-Mat-Su something or other if I need a burn permit (I don't but you never know).

-Fred Meyer jewelry for that purchase of a lifetime

-that restaurant does sound delicious by the description on the radio. What was its name again?

I will be accepting applications presently. Must be 18 or older, able to speak and write English, make dinner, and wait in the car with my kids while I run into the gas station to get a drink without having to buy one for everyone and get them a pack of gum to boot.

Must be available 24/7.

Payment will include my sincere gratitude in saving my sanity and access to one of the most brilliant minds of this century.

It's a secret...

What is the secret, you ask. Well don't tell anyone but I had a great time camping! We spent 3 nights and 4 days in Ninilchik, AK. Our bishop and Relief Society President and their families have been friends for 20 some years. Many moons ago they bought cabin lots next to each other and camped on them all summer long until they built their cabins a few years ago. Now all of you thinking "cabins" like you think of cabins in Jackson, WY or Saranac Lake, NY don't. We used an outhouse, and they still heat their own water (with a gas stove). However they have woodstoves to heat (which came in handy when I was afraid Ethan was hypothermic one night and we moved in to their floor) and couches to sit on and beds to sleep in so compared to us back in their trees, it was a luxury palace.

Our host's cabin.

Every Memorial Day these two families and several other friends who also have lots and cabins in the same development, invite everyone to come down for the start of the King Salmon run, which begins the Saturday before Memorial Day at midnight. The problem this year was the fish forgot to check their calenders and didn't come. Memorial Day was early so they will probably show up next week.

However, we still went clamming, saw 3 moose (including the one that Champ chased through camp), went to Homer, roasted marshmallows, played football, saw a million bald eagles, shared potluck dinners, a Sunday night devotional, ate fried halibut and homemade chowder and relaxed with some awesome new friends.

Here are the pictures:



Carter in all his clamming glory. The clam gun is in the background to the left.

Clamming happens at low tide and Ninilchik Beach is supposed to be the best place in Alaska to do it. The record for that beach is a 20 lb. clam! We walked around in freezing cold temperatures in this thick, muddy sand looking for little divots in the sand that mark where a clam is below the surface. Then we would jam a Clam Gun way down into the sand and pull hard, hopefully pulling the clam with it and not a little bit of muddy, soupy water and sand. If you did not suck the clam up, you got down on your hands and knees and reached into the hole up to your armpit and dug the clam out of the bottom of your hole. But you better be fast because those suckers are fast. The real die hards come as the tide is going out and follow it all the way out and then come all the way back up the beach as the tide is coming in.

Ethan getting filmed by Brother Rampton as he kisses his first clam. Brother Rampton was so awesome with all the kids. He had them roasting him marshmallows for a rating 1-10 on well they did. It usually required a sampling of the wares too! In exchange, he dared the kids to see how many gumballs they could fit in their mouth (chewed). Our friend T got 24 in his mouth!!

The clamming group. About half of the people we camped with this weekend.

Olivia loved it!! She even went again on Monday with just JaDee and Carter. She was the only little kid not crying at the end and she and Carter were the only kids who went back on Monday. Brother Rampton called her a "real Alaska girl." She loved everything about the outdoors.

An eagle at The Overlook in Homer. There were eagles everywhere!

Us at The Overlook in Homer after church on Sunday

So my poll was tied at an equal amount of staying home this weekend or going on the backpacking trip with the girls. And after 3 successful nights of staying warm, thanks to a new bag and a supply of strategically placed hand warmers, I can stay warm at night.

And so I am going to the great outdoors again this weekend!!

I know, I know! What has happened to me??

It's over!

Finally school is over. We can say good-bye to Professor Umbridge and bask in the glow that is a learning experience and an obstacle overcome by hard work, perseverance and maybe just a little eye rolling.

But as all of you out there know, the end of the school year also means crazy schedules and weird requests from the school (like the day my boys both had class picnics and signed me up to bring a green salad and chips n salsa). That combined with our sun setting at 11 PM and rising at 5 AM and never getting dark enough to see stars has lead to havoc and mayhem this week.

Oh and the 4 day camping extravaganza in Ninilchik this weekend to welcome the King Salmon Run. I tell ya, camping is ever-so-much more work than any other "vacation" on the planet. But that will be a post for next week.

And as a result of all this busy-ness I neglected the two HUGE events last Saturday. They would be Olivia's first ever ballet recital and Ethan's birthday party at the high school pool

She keeps asking to go back to the stage to do it again. She loves ballet and her teacher is fabulous. And I got to do little girl hair and dress her up in a tutu!

Then because I am brilliant I forgot about this ever important event in Olivia's little life when I signed up for the 2 PM time slot at the pool. See the recital was at 1 PM 15 miles south of us. The pool party was at 2 PM 8 miles North of us. See, brilliant! As in a brilliant way to stress a mother beyond all reason and rack her with guilt for not being at both important life events for her children.

But it worked out OK. I'd say a large part of this working out is due precisely to my ability to carefully plan stressful, overbooked days. It's a Moncur talent that you can even get when you marry into the family.

We got done dancing and were back on the road dressed in swimsuits by 2:10 and found the party running smoothly. A huge thanks to JaDee, The DeKays, Kim and Janet for being my hands, eyes and camera while I was out!

And I have to share you the pictures from my date last Friday! JaDee and I went on a short hike at The Nature Center and got to see this! This is practically my back yard!

No bears but we thought we saw some of these and I about crapped my pants.

But it was really only some of these.

Which is good because they didn't give us a Wolf Aware assembly.

A Conundrum

The meaning of the word conundrum is :

1: a riddle whose answer is or involves a pun 2: a question or problem having only a conjectural answer b: an intricate and difficult problem

And this is what I find myself in. See I got invited to go on an all girls 5 mile back packing trip the weekend after Memorial Day. My good friend Bethany invited me and my good friend J is going too. Both enjoy camping and as you all know, I, alas, do not. So here in lies the conundrum, if I go I get to hang out with some awesome friends and meet some new ones; I get a break from the kiddos on an overnight, even; I get to see Alaska and its amazingly beautiful atmosphere. The problem is it is camping. And we are already going camping for 3 days as a family this weekend so that would mean 2 weekends in a row NOT in my big comfy bed, shower, or dare I say comfortable. So I am asking you all in a poll what I should do.

Should I stay or should I go?

Bear Aware

Yes. This is what my kids learned at an assembly at school last week. Like I said on facebook, no stranger Danger here, just your average outdoor survival skills to get you to and from school. The really funny thing was how we found out about this informative assembly, because you know when we asked the kids how school was they said, "Fine." And when we asked them what did they do today, they said, "Nothing."

We were coming home from this:

(56 schools make up this 6th grade orchestra and band )

Sonic Boom

A very cool 56 school 6t hgrade band/orchestra combined concert at the largest venue in Anchorage (and I dare think Alaska), the Sullivan Arena. Home to the Alaska Aces hockey team and UAA Seawolves hockey team (does anyone know what a "Seawolf is?).

The mayor was their and played his trumpet with an ensemble for the National Anthem and Alaska's State Song (does Utah have a state song?). The Superintendent MC'd the whole event (do I dare think Dr. Menlove has shown up to anything like this in Box Elder county or does he merely collect a paycheck?).

Needless to to say it was an impressive show. I was thrilled to see a community so supportive of the music program in their district. Police were there to direct traffic. Sullivan Arena staff set up, took down, ushered and congratulated the kids as they walked by. I was grateful to the teachers who pulled this all together and the students who took such pride in their performance.

And then on the way home, or rather when we were stuck waiting to get out of the parking lot for 25 minutes, Carter ran to the nearby woods because he was in need of facilities. OK he had to pee and that was as good as it was getting in a stand still parking lot (lets just say that 65,000 BYU cougar fans have exited a parking lot faster than 7,000 band parents. Another thing we Mormons can be proud of).

When he returned I joked, "Good thing you didn't get eaten by a bear in those woods."

Ethan says, "Oh don't worry. We learned all about what to do in an accidental bear encounter."

"What?" I ask. I am not sure which to question first. His use of the words "accidental bear encounter," or where he learned what to do in case of one.

Then Carter joins the conversation, "Yeah at the Bear Aware Assembly."

Again me, "What?"

"Oh we had aspecial assembly to learn what to do if we encounter a bear in the wild."

Thereis that word again: encounter. Now I use big words and expect my kids to know them, but "encounter" has never been part of my vocabulary. What the heck are these guys talking about

JaDee and I are laughing so hard we have tears streaming down our faces. JaDee asks "So you had a Bear Aware assembly to teach you all what to do if you run into a bear? What did they teach you

Ethan goes "Oh you stand up and wave your arms (picture him looking like an air traffic controller backing out a jumbo jet) and go 'Hey bear. Hey bear.'" This time picture how an air traffic controller sounds; rather monotonous.

He also tells us of "one accidental encounter where the lady was seriously injured."

By this time we are not trying to control ourselves and JaDee and I are about ready to fall out of the parked car. We then proceed to be our usual cynical, sarcastic selves and comment to each other.

"Yeah, because a bears know English and are for sure going to run if they see that."

"Can't you just see the grizzly charging on a kindergartner stopping dead in its tracks because she is waving her arms and saying 'hey bear.'"

"Wait! Wait! How do you think those kindergartners felt walking home from school today along the wooded path behind the school!"

"Yeah, I bet more than one mom is trying to figure out how come her kid wet his pants today."

It went on and on like that between us while Carter and Ethan keep interjecting, "What is so funny?" "I don't get it."

It continued the whole way home, once we actually got moving, while we were playing 20 Questions with the kids.

"OK, its a thing."

"I know, I know!" shouts" JaDee. "Its an assembly for the bears teaching them that when they see a little kid waving its arms they shouldn't eat them."
We were having a great time. At least JaDee and I were right up until it was time for bed and Ethan tells me he is never walking to Collin's house (about 1/8 of a mile away) because of the bears. Oh brother.

I tell him how there have been bears on Grandma's farm. I have pictures of a baby up a telephone pole with us in hot pursuit of the perfect picture. JaDee has stories of chasing them out of the beat fields on tractors and Great Grandma McNiven has pictures of them eating out of their car windows in Yellowstone. I then ask him how many times he has seen a bear on the farm.

"None." is the reply.

"I doubt you will run into a bear here either. But if you do go back the way you came. Or you can go to any of the 15 houses between us and Collins and ask them to call your mom to come get you."

At this point the odds are that there aren't any pedophiles between us and Collin and if there are we have a 1 out of 15 chance Ethan won't go to that house if he accidentally encounters" a bear. I am pretty sure if he ever does encounter a bear I will take my chances on his not choosing a pedophile for help. Seriously, how often does lightning have to strike in one day?

"Besides," I continue. "Your first defense against running into a bear is making noise. And lets face it, my boy, you are not exactly my quietest child."

I am pretty sure we will be safe.

Because of course, we had a Bear Aware Assembly.

Mother's Day recap

Yesterday was Mother's Day and it was also Ethan's 8th Birthday!! WOW! When Carter turned 8, I was pregnant with Olivia. I remember thinking it was going to be soooooo long until Ethan turned 8 and my inutero Livs would be going on 4. That time has now come to pass. We had a great birthday, simple but great. Ravioli, salad and garlic bread. Followed by strawberry shortcake. We missed our family who came for all the birthdays these last 8.5 years but invited our friends J+J and their kids. Mom J was flying solo as her hubby is off to Russia these next 17 days so I figured there was no sense in 2 of us moms cooking for ourselves on Mother's Day.

Ethan got a cool bike with gears and hand breaks, per request. A Lego contraption called a Power Miner, a jump rope, a digital voice recorder, and his grown up Sunday clothes (ie. a blazer to go along with new slacks. He also picked out a bow tie to pull the whole outfit together). After a couple of crashes on the new bike he was sporting two banged up knees and headed off for the trampoline to make it feel better.

As for my portion of Mother's Day, we went to this amazing sushi place like a mile from our house on Saturday night. It was so good! We had all tried mediocre sushi before without much success but I love California rolls, so after several recommendations we decided to give Shine's a try. The kids all wanted to try octopus, so we got a couple of rolls to split. They loved it! Then I got tuna, octopus, and salmon with my CA rolls for dinner. I loved the tuna! The boys got some tempura shrimp, and sesame chicken and snuck more bites of octopus from me. And since there didn't seem to be any forks on the premises, even Olivia got the handle of chopsticks.

Then Sunday morning Ethan surprised with a beautiful handmade card and a ceramic bowl that he shaped and painted himself in art, filled with candy just for me. He had been bursting with this surprise all week waiting to give it to me. I loved it.

ps-The candy didn't last long!

A weighty issue

THE LOVELL WALK FOR BRIDGER HAS BEEN CHANGED TO JUNE 13 AT 7 AM!!!

5 of the 6 Moncur kids and their families will be there (even us from Alaska)!

Show your support by donating with the button on the right or show up and walk/run with us!

My sister in law Cara posted about reverse anorexia. She hit the nail on the head with this one. Keep in mind Cara looks like Cameron Diaz and she NEVER wears makeup so I should hate her. Instead I love her and that sweet new baby Kate that I got to mug on over my Utah trip.

But the subject at hand is weight. The other day I asked JaDee if I was the same girl he married almost 13 years ago. He said the only thing different about me was that I tend to think/obsess with how I look. I agree. I do obsess more with how I look, but my ponderings have lead me to discover why.

13 years ago I was tiny. I am only 5 feet one half inch tall, so not even 5'1". The scales never topped 103 and I actually lost 7 pounds in the weeks leading up to our wedding because I was stressed. I could by anything off a rack at any store and never worried if it was going to look good because it always did. When I got pregnant with Carter 3 months after we were married, I knew I was not going to be one of those women who were never skinny again after a baby because I always ate and still stayed at my 103 lbs.

For example, at lunch all through high school my mother made my lunch. I ate it all. My tuna sandwich on homemade white bread, apple, carrots, homemade brownie/cookie. Then I went to the snack line at the cafeteria and picked up a cherry pie and a pint of whole milk. EVERY DAY I ate this.

So I got used to being the tiny one.

Back to Carter's pregnancy. I ate what I wanted and then gained 50 pounds. He was 9 pounds at birth and I went home with 25 pounds to lose.

I never lost the last 12.

Then with Ethan I was smarter and seriously at ice cream twice that entire pregnancy. I gained 40 pounds and it took 3 years and a huge amount of walking these gigantic hills in my neighborhood, but I lost all of it back to when I got pregnant with him. 115 if you are good at math.

Then Olivia. I was so good with here. It helped that sweets made me sick the entire time with her and I walked 3 miles 3 days a week right up to delivery. I had 8 pounds to lose with her and even wore my jeans 2 weeks after she was born.

Then I turned 30. And in the 3 years since Olivia was born I have not lost those last 8 pounds and in fact have gained 10. I work out. I watch what I eat, and I obsess.

Why do I obsess? (and any doubt you had about my obsession was erased by this lengthy description of every pound I have ever gained in the last decade). I think I know.

Mothers give everything. From the moment my feet hit the floor to the moment I o to bed at night I am living for someone else. Every mess I make in the kitchen is to provide food for someone. Then I clean it up. Every load of laundry is full of someone else's clothes. My dream car is a mini-van to cart other people around. My house decorating revolves around hiding toys, durable fabrics and traffic patterns in the carpet. I go on field trips to release salmon eggs and dissect cow eyes. I cook hot milk the "right way," hold a blanket the "right way," and play Groovy Girls the "right way."

I am at the very top of normal for my height, my BMI is fine, I have very low cholesterol and a great heart rate and blood pressure. I know I am healthy and I know I look fine. I know I bore 3 healthy children and should be proud of a little roundness. I know all of this.

But still why the obsession? Is it Hollywood? No. I hate self-serving, propaganda pushing, rhetoric talking people.

Is it the fact that my mom is heavy? Partly. I see how unhappy she has been with her extra pounds and vow to never get like that.

But mostly it is this: As a mother I have given huge portions of myself to 3 little people. While I still have a fairly good sense of "self" I still can't deny that I am lost to that person 13 years ago who was going to go to law school,/run for Senate,/be a college professor. Therefore the extra weight now is merely the physical embodiment of all that self sacrifice. It is a tangible disturbance to what I have really lost/given.

So now what. Would I do it all over again differently? Some days yes. Most days no. Are the 3 little people who depend on me for food, shelter, love, guidance, support, boundaries, values, lessons, and hope a good investment of my former energy, dreams, and goals? Yes.

Because if anything giving these little people such a huge part of my self and my life has taught me more than if I had just held onto it. I do think of others everywhere more, I am less self centered, more selfless, more adventurous, more courageous, more stalwart in my beliefs, more firm in my convictions, more adamant about education, and more devoted to the future. I listen more, and actually talk less. I stop before I speak and weigh each word carefully. I have a bigger world than the one that just revolves around me.

And it is a beautiful world.

The Little Red Hen (got eaten by a dog)

I have this friend named Suzie, who brought the most delicious loaf of homemade wheat bread to my house after we moved here. We are really good friends with her son, J and his wife, also J, who have 3 kids that match mine in age and gender (they have to remain anonymous because they are part of the witness protection program). Anyway they too make this delicious bread and shared the recipe with me.

Yesterday I ground the wheat. By hand. All by myself with 30 Rock playing on Netflix. Mixed the bread. Locked it in my warm car for 90 minutes to rise. And baked the bread. Except it didn't turn out like theirs so I did not take any pictures and decided I would wait to blog about my Little Red Hen experience until I could boast of a success.

Until I came downstairs this morning after doing loads of laundry to see that my dog had eaten one whole loaf.

Yeah, he has never heard the story of the Little Red Hen.

And tomorrow I may be posting about dog indigestion.

We now continue with the regularly scheduled program

To read the whole story about Bridger and his bone marrow transplant fundraiser click here or

here.

And now I need to continue my posts about my trip. Because this is what made my trip so fantastic!

I have the best friends in the whole world. I know you think yours are the best, but really, mine are better. And if you are reading this, you are probably one of my friends so you will agree that we are the best... EVER!!

First there are these guys:

(front) Jen, Vonda, Barb, Linda, Steph, (back) Sherie, me, Sharon, Liz

We are at Idle Ilse, home of the best food, and an awesome waiter named Spencer. We gave him Stephanie's daughter's number because we all loved this guy so much he needs to be part of someone family that we know. I had been running about 15 minutes late coming through a blizzard in Sardine Canyon, so when I walked in everyone was there at "our" table. And I burst into tears as Sharon rushed up to wrap me in a tight Welcome Home hug. I knew I was happy to see my peeps but wow! I don't usually cry. But this was home. They are home for me.

Then came this.

Sherie, Sharon, Me, Liz, Vicki, and Ruth

WICKED!! I know you have all heard how awesome it was. But seriously, take it from a very discerning critic. It was fabulous. Simple props, simple costumes. simply an amazing well put together plot that for the first time ever has me saying "It was better than the book." Seriously, when does anyone ever say that?

I got a great surprise when Naomi brought Chris with her to pick me up at the airport. Naomi's kids are a handful, as anyone in Perry can attest to, but the countless hours they spent at my house were such a joy to our family. Her daughter Stephie made a shirt for Olivia as a going away present all by herself on the sewing machine, and sent a 12x12 scrapbook page home with me of a cute picture of Olivia this trip. After 6 months of unemployment, her husband got a job in Cincinnati. Sadly, they will be gone by the time I get back to UT. We will miss you guys so much!!! Between Naomi and Chris I do not think there is a vegetable they can't can, a garden they can't grow, and challenges they can't face. With a disabled son, I have seen Chris go to super human lengths to find the best doctors, food, and care for her child. Truly Chris is an example to me.

And I got to see my peeps at USU. In honor of LMFD , Della, Kristy, and Kim are dubbed LMFB (Little Miss Fish Bowl) in honor of the glass cube our office is located in. These gals are so fun and little does the management know that it is all the LMFB's who run that place and if we ever got an inkling to make life heck for the administration (and consequently get fired) we could.

And then I have these two girls in my corner:

Ranae is my friend from the good ole days in New York. She moved to my ward when we were like 12 or 13. We were in different High schools but did a ton together. Oh the stories we could share. But since our parents read this (and are on Facebook) there is no safe place for confession! You will have to just use your imagination and don't hold back! Whenever I hear the song "No Rain," by Blind Melon I think of running around in Ranae's little silver wagon and me crushing my fingers in the sun roof to see if it would really hurt. Together we have lived in NY, then I spent a summer in TX after she had left all her friends to entertain me, and then UT twice. I haven't quite got her convinced to come to Alaska, but the way our lives have always crossed I wouldn't be surprised.

Tonya is another friend from way back. College days at least. When she was single and I was married with Carter as a pre-schooler, she would ask JaDee if I could play. We lived in the newly remodeled HO house that was now suitable for families, not single guys who liked to jump off their roof. Tonya took me to parties in Provo in the garages of apartment buildings where the music could rock and the cops couldn't hear to enforce the 11 PM noise ordinance. Now with 7 kids between us we get our kicks out of Fogurt and Nordstrom Rack.

And definitly not least is Kristy. She came with the Moncurs as EmRee's best friend. We have lunched in Beaver Creek CO and know the drive to Lovell is not for the faint hearted. Kristy remembers the days when every boy had a shotgun in his pickup at the high school in case something ran across the road on the drive home that needed shootin'. At least that is why JaDee says they were there (he also says there was no way anyone would try to shoot up their school because EVERYONE would run to their trucks and take care of it all before the cops could even back their cruisers out). Anyway, Kristy is helping me spread the word to all the Lovell-ites about Bridger, because she loves him too!

So while I am not officially counting down the days to move back, I am thinking about all of you who keep me going, even from so far away. When I was really down in the dumps after we first got here it was all of you who sent me messages and phone calls full of words of encouragement reminding me of who I am and what I am capable of . YOU GUYS ROCK!!!

Remember that Calgon commercial?

To read about how you can help my nephew Bridger, click here for the whole story.

Thank you! thank you! To those who have sent prayers and donations for Bridger.

And I must blog.
So referring to the title "Remember that Calgon commercial?" Well I am thinking about it again. I know I know I just got back from UT by myself. But JaDee left 3 days later for Virginia Beach. In fact pre-Alaska it was a trip he finagled with the intentions that both of us would be going. We were going to pawn off our kids on unsuspecting relatives and go away to a beach side hotel.

Alas we do not live near any unsuspecting relatives and JaDee went alone. And his classes/conferences were less than interesting (I have to be careful how I word things because his boss reads my blog :) His hotel beach was being dredged and the weather turned cold.

But keep in mind his temps were warmer than here and we were in shorts. I even saw kids running through the sprinklers.

I felt my stores of alone time drain away as I held us all above water. It is so much nicer having someone to share this with. I really missed JaDee this trip. Not only because I could not tighten the kids scooter handle, retrieve bikes from the garage ceiling, or figure out if our grass really needs watered. We have hardly seen each other this month. And there has not exactly been a lot of quality time since we even got to this state. I am finally feeling like I have adjusted and come to terms with all the changes and challenges. I feel like I can pay attention to my spouse again.

So when JaDee asked me if I was still mad at him for moving us to Alaska before he left. I stopped and took inventory of my feelings and finally said, "I don't think so."

"That's what I thought. I mean at least you aren't yelling at me anymore, so I figured I better ask to make sure."

It never hurts to be safe.