all better

Whew! This has been a roller coaster of a week. And I have finally worked through my animosity towards Alaska and my husband and feel ready to talk this out on a blog. But first let me tell you about a topic I find interesting: Are blogs self-centered? Does having a blog mean you are self-centered?

You probably have guessed that I am an avid reader of c-jane's blog. She was recently accused of being the most self-centered person one particular reader had ever read. Hmmmmm... As I was cruising the comments surrounding her post about this I found another blogger, Crazy in Gilbert, had also been accused of being self-centered by a friend, no less.

Both of these women have pretty thick skin regarding these accusations, which were not stated nearly so nicely as I am presenting them here. In fact Crazy in Gilbert was hilarious in her comment on c jane about her self centeredness and even stated that anyone with a blog has got to be a little self centered to think that what we post actually matters.

So here is my soap box on the profile of a blogger: and I really only get to the "mommy bloggers" because that is the circle I am in and stage of life I am at. So these comments may not apply to political, food, educational, support group or any other blog.

Anywho back to the profile of a blogger: Bloggers are confident rather than self centered, and tend to be more of an extrovert in personality. they are social, outgoing, and for the most part articulate. I would guess that most have at least some education beyond high school and many a have graduated college. They are probably verbal learners and not overly shy. In a nut shell they are confidant, empowered, and comfortable in life, and in who they are, and what they believe.

There, I got that out of my system.

Now back to the story and the reason I have started counting the days (1076) until we can leave Alaska. And I have always been a counter so at this point in time I simply can't stop counting down, now that I have started.

Monday Dec 29 brought about a change in our financial plan regarding the purchase of a house. The housing market in Utah was indeed a factor and the fact that the recession has not hit Alaska is another factor. I said several months before this move came about that I feel sorry for anyone who has to move in this market. Those words turned out to be prophetic, for me.

As a result my plan unraveled. I do not do well when my plan unravels. It would be one thing if it was just me and JaDee, but my 3 babies are involved here and this is my first experience moving with them. Carter was 3 when we bought our house in Perry. And he was only 18 months when we left Delaware. None of my kids have ever known change and I wanted to look out for every possible need they would have.

Not to mention multiply that by the stress of holding it all together, the move, the sadness I had not really let myself feel and work through. It was a formula for a breaking point and break I did.

I demanded to move home. I told The Mighty Hunter that he could have his adventure, I would be waiting in WY with at his mother's house until he was done or until I could get my brother Stephen to come drive my stuff back down to civilization (how does Wyoming feel now that I have elevated it to "civilization" status? The Alaska move has been good for something)!

The four walls of what was becoming the "eternal hotel stay" were closing in. The kids and I had to get out. I had to feel in control and capable of doing something so we hopped in the car and set out to find this indoor jump gym for the kids to burn off some steam. I found its road on my map. I warmed up the car in the sub-zero temperature. I even got a frozen door unstuck.

And then I got lost and kept sliding all over the frozen tundra of Anchorage's city streets.

My cell phone rang.

It was JaDee.

"Where are you?" he asks in a meek and timid voice because I am a ticking time bomb.

"Did you buy me plane tickets to Billings yet?"

"No," comes the barely audible answer.

"Then I don’t want to talk to you." click.

I call back. "Where is Costco? I need snow tires NOW!!" By this time Ethan and Olivia are asleep, it has taken us 90 minutes to get nowhere and I still need to feel productive.

I get directions to Costco. It is an older one (note that thought for later). I pull up to the tire center and march in.

"I need snow tires." I demand.

"Well," drawls the tire tech. "You need to go through the store and pick out the ones you want. Pay for them and ROLL them back here and we will put them on."

"Are you serious? I have 2 sleeping children in the car and I am 5 feet tall. Do I look like I can just roll 4 snow tires back here?!??" Yes I said that. I have since confirmed that normal Costcos provide a full service you-do-not-have-to-touch-the-tires-ever institution. Alaska women are apparently held to a different standard than those of us from the lower 48. They get fly rods for Christmas and hunt their own moose up here for heaven sake. What is a couple of snow tires to a women like that?

I walked out with the little punk calling, "Wait! We'll help you!" yeah. thanks for the afterthought.

Now I was on a mission. I drove aimlessly really and found TIREMOBILE. It looked greasy enough. I pulled up, marched in and pleaded with the man at the counter.

"I have just moved here from Utah. I need snow tires. Please help me!"

He tries to joke, "Well they have snow in Utah don't they?"

I don't laugh but stare him straight in the eye, "Yeah well they plow our roads."

He took the cue and stopped joking and actually looked past my rudeness to call 3 other tire shops before he found a set for me. Had it delivered, gave me a break on the labor fee and didn't charge me for the delivery. His place was full of good ole boys who have been coming to him for years and the man who actually did the work didn't have any teeth. I swear. But he held the door for me. They were all very nice to me and the kids. I felt a little better.

Whew this has gotten long! (as usual I guess...)

After a trip to REI to gear up my poor babies (Ethan was crying he was so cold after the 20 minutes we spent looking at the ice sculptures last week). More fruitless house hunting (3 have sold from us right as we were ready to make an offer...3!) countless of hopeless sounding texts, emails and facebook exchanges to my friends, and countless phone calls to potential rental properties who did not want pets (and in one case children) we found a house.

WE FOUND A HOUSE!

Here is how it went down:

I woke up New Years Day with several positive emails. Vicki, Sharon, Sherie via text, Ranae, Naomi, Amy via blog, Laurie made me laugh right out loud via blog...All shared horrible moving stories, and words of tremendous encouragement to me. I cried for me and I cried for my homesickness for all to them. We had missed Sharon's annual New Year’s bash and I was sad for that. All of you had more faith in me than I did. All of you held me up and I know you prayed when I couldn't. It felt better to know that every transition has its challenges (to say the least) I started finding my faith and got ready to see to 2 rentals New Years Day.

We took one. It will be home. It feels right. It worked! February 1 is the magic day and school gets to start on Monday. Hurray the routine! Hurray the normalcy! Hurray the details can start to fall into place (like my mail that is on hold in Utah...can't wait to get all those Christmas cards)!

Love you all! You mean the world to me!